Two Seconds to Breathe

The unraveling of suppressed emotions in an unexpected place

Somewhere over Serbia, at 38,000 feet in the air, I allowed myself to cry.

On the flight to France, on my way to cook at events I have been planning since February, I had brought with me a book I saw on Emiko Davies’ Substack; How to Cook a Wolf by M.F.K Fisher. This book was published in 1942 as a lifestyle advice for people going through the scarcities that come as a consequence of reckless wars.

Before even going into the chapters of the book, I was already caught up in my emotions. I was still in the introduction of the revised edition (1952) and it hit me really hard. In the past six years, we went through a devastating economic crash, a global pandemic with a suspicious lockdown, shortages in anything imported (Lebanon imports most of the goods or raw materials for food and non-food industries), literal blackouts on top of the usual power cuts, a destroyed port, bombings, ethnic cleansing, invasion, and occupation. Some of these were labeled as a “war” by the media, but looking at all of this from afar, it has been nothing but a continuous nonstop war.

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Comeback and Recovery with an Easy Vegan Pancakes

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A recipe requires the coherence of many elements. Getting orgasmic results from a recipe is the fruit of love, patience, care and quality ingredients. Sometimes you cook something out of the need to eat. And regardless of the quality, it will be something good to chew on and fill your tummy with but never repeat. Other times the recipe is amazing; simply enjoyable you want to make it over and over again. Yet each time is different from the other. My biggest fear was for the recipe to fail. Although I don’t usually follow the rules completely but I keep hoping it’ll work. The worst feeling is when your fear materializes in front of you. The time and effort happily spent turns into anxiety and panic. You know you messed up at one point but keep hoping it’ll work. You keep hoping that with some sugar, spice and nice things it’ll be edible. But when it’s done, it’s over and done. Continue reading “Comeback and Recovery with an Easy Vegan Pancakes”